The thing I got most out of this piece was an 'otherworldly' sense. I know almost nothing about Welsh myth/legend (it's horrible, but I just group all the Welsh/Gaelic/British lore into one mental bucket). This felt like diving into something new. The start of this piece did confuse me with a bunch of terms and names: Urien, draig môr, Môr Hafren. But by the end of the story I actually think you did a great job of making the important names stand out and clarifying what they meant. Grael made sense. Myrddin made sense. Everything seemed to come together. A peek at your glossary helped.
I also thought you handled Morrigan and Myrddin's dialogue well. Those were some of favorite scenes. And growing in size to cross a pool of lava was highly cinematic.
Well that was an interesting take on things, wasn't it? Thoroughly enjoyed it. I love how you were able to sew the myths and legends into one and work it through your story.
This was a really dreamy piece. It was very disjointed in the sense that the moving back and forth between time zones had no bridge or marker. And that's what happens in dreams, of course. Fleeting memories and so on.
Which, likewise, goes perfectly with the Arthurian setting (I'm perhaps thinking especially of the dreamy Merlin scenes in 'Excalibur'). I've loved the Arthurian stuff since I was young, and I think you've captured the genuine magical feel of the real version of the story. I also appreciate the fact that you have a glossary, rather than explanations in-text - that would ruin it. Keeping those Celtic words with no explanations makes the whole thing magical and otherworldly. Merlin does, in fact, sound so much better as Myrddin.
Have you read 'The Sea Priestess' by Dion Fortune? I think you might like that... I have a vision of a movie version of it in my head in which all the extras/background characters are talking Cornish so most people wouldn't understand them, which would add to the otherworldly feel of it...
Ooh, no I haven’t read the book by Dion Fortune, I will check it out … and I dithered about putting a line break in there but she’s recalling it in a fever dream of sorts, so I left them out. Would it better to put them in, you think?
Hmm - I think you should leave it as it is actually - let the whole thing flow seamlessly. I think that's what I was getting at - if you do line breaks you lose that aspect. It really does work as a fever dream as it is.
Obviously you could do a draft version for yourself with the line breaks and see what it looks like - comparing different versions is always an option!
Forgot to say - The Sea Priestess has something of the fever dream to it. It's a real narrative skill to actually get inside the head of the character having that fever dream who doesn't see the world like others do. Possibly because they're not human of course. So yes, if you can get hold of sea priestess then I think you'll know what I'm getting at. Lots of lovely Celtic/Atlantean references too of course.
The thing I got most out of this piece was an 'otherworldly' sense. I know almost nothing about Welsh myth/legend (it's horrible, but I just group all the Welsh/Gaelic/British lore into one mental bucket). This felt like diving into something new. The start of this piece did confuse me with a bunch of terms and names: Urien, draig môr, Môr Hafren. But by the end of the story I actually think you did a great job of making the important names stand out and clarifying what they meant. Grael made sense. Myrddin made sense. Everything seemed to come together. A peek at your glossary helped.
I also thought you handled Morrigan and Myrddin's dialogue well. Those were some of favorite scenes. And growing in size to cross a pool of lava was highly cinematic.
Thanks Sam! And let us just say I used the Welsh myths (particularly the Arthurian ones) as inspiration and leapt from there.
Well that was an interesting take on things, wasn't it? Thoroughly enjoyed it. I love how you were able to sew the myths and legends into one and work it through your story.
Thanks! Now you know why I'm enjoying "The Shield of Locksley"!
Totally get it!
This was a really dreamy piece. It was very disjointed in the sense that the moving back and forth between time zones had no bridge or marker. And that's what happens in dreams, of course. Fleeting memories and so on.
Which, likewise, goes perfectly with the Arthurian setting (I'm perhaps thinking especially of the dreamy Merlin scenes in 'Excalibur'). I've loved the Arthurian stuff since I was young, and I think you've captured the genuine magical feel of the real version of the story. I also appreciate the fact that you have a glossary, rather than explanations in-text - that would ruin it. Keeping those Celtic words with no explanations makes the whole thing magical and otherworldly. Merlin does, in fact, sound so much better as Myrddin.
Have you read 'The Sea Priestess' by Dion Fortune? I think you might like that... I have a vision of a movie version of it in my head in which all the extras/background characters are talking Cornish so most people wouldn't understand them, which would add to the otherworldly feel of it...
Ooh, no I haven’t read the book by Dion Fortune, I will check it out … and I dithered about putting a line break in there but she’s recalling it in a fever dream of sorts, so I left them out. Would it better to put them in, you think?
Hmm - I think you should leave it as it is actually - let the whole thing flow seamlessly. I think that's what I was getting at - if you do line breaks you lose that aspect. It really does work as a fever dream as it is.
Obviously you could do a draft version for yourself with the line breaks and see what it looks like - comparing different versions is always an option!
But I like it as it is...
Forgot to say - The Sea Priestess has something of the fever dream to it. It's a real narrative skill to actually get inside the head of the character having that fever dream who doesn't see the world like others do. Possibly because they're not human of course. So yes, if you can get hold of sea priestess then I think you'll know what I'm getting at. Lots of lovely Celtic/Atlantean references too of course.